Let's ruin your pet

Upload a photo, pick your style(s), and we'll do the rest. Badly.

Pet #1

Pet's name (optional — goes on the portrait)

Add a name and you get both versions — with it and without. Leave it blank for a clean, no-name portrait.

One pet per photo, face visible, no people in frame.

Styles — $5 for one, $8 for two, all 3 for $10

Kid CrayonLike a proud 5-year-old drew your pet with their favorite crayons. Wrong number of legs not guaranteed, but likely.School MarkerA chunky classroom-marker portrait with streaky fills, squeaky outlines, and the confidence of a kid who found the good markers.Kids' Watercolor DisasterA six-year-old's watery masterpiece: muddy puddles, missed spots, runaway color, and a pet hiding somewhere underneath.

Monte's Kid Crayon portrait on a Framed Print

Monte's Kid Crayon portrait on a T-Shirt

Monte's Kid Crayon portrait on a Sticker

Merch comes later (optional). Once your portrait is approved you can put it on a framed print, t-shirt, mug, or sticker — from $5, previewed on the real thing first.

Your order

Total: $0

Where do we send the masterpiece?My pet's portrait may be featured on your social media (never the original photo).

Secure payment via Stripe. By ordering you agree to the terms. Delivered by email within 48 hours.